- English translation
The bereaved are asleep, while those offering condolences are on their feet.
- Literal wording
The dead person’s family slept, while the condolence-givers rose.
- Meaning and lesson
The saying reproaches outsiders who assume the appearance of grief more energetically than the deceased person’s own family. Their conspicuous mourning is presented as a display rather than an honest response to the loss.
It is said when people take over another party’s sorrow and act as if they bear it themselves. The image contrasts the family’s inaction with condolence-givers who theatrically occupy the place of mourners.
- When it is used
Use it to criticize people who ostentatiously perform concern over someone else’s misfortune, especially when they seem to claim a role that belongs to those directly affected.
Cite or copy proverb
How this record reached us: Editorially sourced.
Report an issue with this meaning: The bereaved are asleep, while those offering condolences are on their feet.